Butterflies in My Stomach!!!

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I hope those of you who celebrated the July 4 Independence Day holiday had a great one!  There is still one more day to this fabulous long weekend.  If many of you are like me, I love holidays!  It’s a time to catch up with my children, reconnect with my husband, check-in with extended family and friends and bring more order (i.e., long-overdue spring cleaning) to my household… a time to re-evaluate and adjust my balance system!

As a mom of a child with food allergies, holidays (and quite frankly, most celebratory and social events) also trigger a certain level (although over time this level of anxiety has diminished) of anxiety.  Whether it is a July 4 BBQ or a birthday party, I am constantly faced with the challenge of preparing wheat-free, egg-free, nut-free and most everything-else free cakes, brownies, cookies and cupcakes.

Many times I will call the host and ask “So, have you decided on what you plan to offer as a treat for the kids?”  Other times, I make a guess as to what to bring.   I would like to think that besides being driven by my child’s well-being and safety, I also am driven by the idea of helping my child and other children understand more about food allergies, acknowledge their differences and accept them.  As I prepared treats for a BBQ this weekend, I realized that I also just want my child to fit-in.  Unlike the maestro of the Boston Pops, my goal is to help orchestrate a non-event.  From BBQ chicken (having pulled the host aside to ask about each ingredient in the rub) to the cupcakes, I want my child’s transitions to be seamless.

During the last several years, I have tried quite a number of approaches:

(1) “Match Treat” approach – I would call up the host to find out what the treat is and even what color is the frosting. The goal? Typically is to prepare a slice of cake that perfectly matches the main dessert.

(2) “Reasoned Treat” approach -  I usually don’t call the host in advance for a copy of the menu.  Instead, I just make assumptions.  For example, if it is a birthday party, there is a greater likelihood that the main treat will be a cake rather than cookies.  The challenging aspect about this approach is the unpredictability.  I attended a couple of birthday parties armed with vanilla frosting and food coloring in case I had to “mix-to-match” on the spot.

(3)  “Kid-a-li-cious Treats” approach – Instead of baking a piece of cake for just my son, I make treats that all little ones can enjoy.  Although not effective at a birthday party (picture the scenario: Hi, I prepared a cake for your little one’s birthday party just so my kid and your kids can enjoy the same treat), it is a wonderful approach for every other event.

Which one are you? Over the years, I have come to lean more towards the “kid-a-li-cious” approach because it helps with that seamless transition.  Most importantly, the “kid-a-li-cious” approach has a certain flexibility built-in where you  no longer have to uncover the main treat in advance.  Instead, I prepare whatever I like with the idea that my kid and other children will enjoy it!

This July 4 weekend, I prepared butterfly-shaped and ice-cream cone shaped cupcakes using my Nordic cast iron pans.  Unlike the other talented  and lovely contributors to Zomppa who prepare exquisite baked goods from scratch, I am more of a cake mix “plus” type.  You should check out Gluten-free Goddess for awesome recipes from scratch!  I found a cake-mix that is easy to make and very tasty.  In addition, I often will add pure maple syrup, brown sugar, tapioca flour and a touch of fruit juice (i.e., apples or peaches) to the ingredients.

The cupcakes are excellent 90% of the time.  They are fluffy and light – slowly melting in your mouth.  The remaining 10% are less predictable…well, the cupcakes taste more like mini french baguettes (I think it is the tapioca flour – too much of it gives it a gummy consistency!)

Well, regardless of whether your approach is the  “Match Treats”, “Reasoned” or “Kid-a-li-cious”,  I salute you because of your efforts (however tiresome) to normalize your child’s experience and bring that child happiness.  My son’s eyes light up every time I tell him we are going to prepare treats for his friends.  He wants his friends to love his mommy’s cupcakes….I mean, is there a kid who does not share this desire?

At the BBQ this weekend, my butterfly cupcakes were gaily displayed for curious little fingers to capture.  I can’t tell you if the kids ate them or not, but I can tell you that my little guy didn’t even notice…he just seemed content that he can bring something special to the party!

Happy July 4!

Tags: baby, cake, children, cupcake, food, food allergies, food allergy, gluten-free, Gluten-free Goddess, health, health-childrens-health, Nordic cast iron pan, party, preschool, snack, toddler, wheat-free

Category: Featured Articles: Health & Nutrition, Health & Nutrition, Kids & Food